The #MeToo movement has seen many brave celebrities come forward with their stories in the last year or so and seen an increase in the international conversation about violence against women and other minorities. The reason I wanted to stand up here and share part of my story today is because there is something more powerful about hearing a story from someone you know. It has the potential to hit home how truly epidemic the mistreatment of women and other minorities really is and might help dispel many of the rape myths that persist throughout our societies and cultures.
By dispelling rape myths, we can create a safe space for survivors to come forward. A space for them to tell their stories without being asked: “What were you wearing?” “How much did you have to drink?” or “Why didn’t you push them off?” Questions that are never asked of victims of any other crime. These questions stem from an established culture of victim blaming and a fundamental and widespread misunderstanding of rape and other sexual crimes. Only by keeping the conversation alive across the globe can we begin to reshape how we see crimes like this. We need to begin to see sexual abuse and harassment for what it is and not dismiss it as a nuisance women have to put up with as part of their every day lives.
In order to change the perception of rape and begin to tackle the epidemic rates of abuse that pervade our society, education is key. Everyone needs to be taught that consent is black and white; that there are no grey areas. Everyone should know that an enthusiastic yes means yes and everything else means no. We need to change Sex and Healthy Relationship Education so that it includes topics like boundaries, communication and respect. The biggest change needs to be that people are taught what rape is (and it is many things) and that it is wrong; rather than how not to get raped so that we shift the blame and the shame away from the survivor and onto the rapist.
If everybody can take away one thing from this event, please let it be that every single one of you in this room has the power and a duty to educate each other. We have to begin pointing out inappropriate jokes and behaviours. If we do, we can begin to make an essential change in society where so-called sexual misdemeanours get called out for what they really are. If we do, perpetrators can be held accountable for what they’ve really done. And if we do, victims can get the right support for what really happened to them.
I want to finish by saying thank you to all of you for being here and supporting not only the cause but for supporting me. I really have been overwhelmed by the response I’ve had and can’t believe this event has been so successful! For all those that have shared their stories with me, or their friends stories, and to all those whose stories remain untold – tonight is about you!
By dispelling rape myths, we can create a safe space for survivors to come forward. A space for them to tell their stories without being asked: “What were you wearing?” “How much did you have to drink?” or “Why didn’t you push them off?” Questions that are never asked of victims of any other crime. These questions stem from an established culture of victim blaming and a fundamental and widespread misunderstanding of rape and other sexual crimes. Only by keeping the conversation alive across the globe can we begin to reshape how we see crimes like this. We need to begin to see sexual abuse and harassment for what it is and not dismiss it as a nuisance women have to put up with as part of their every day lives.
In order to change the perception of rape and begin to tackle the epidemic rates of abuse that pervade our society, education is key. Everyone needs to be taught that consent is black and white; that there are no grey areas. Everyone should know that an enthusiastic yes means yes and everything else means no. We need to change Sex and Healthy Relationship Education so that it includes topics like boundaries, communication and respect. The biggest change needs to be that people are taught what rape is (and it is many things) and that it is wrong; rather than how not to get raped so that we shift the blame and the shame away from the survivor and onto the rapist.
If everybody can take away one thing from this event, please let it be that every single one of you in this room has the power and a duty to educate each other. We have to begin pointing out inappropriate jokes and behaviours. If we do, we can begin to make an essential change in society where so-called sexual misdemeanours get called out for what they really are. If we do, perpetrators can be held accountable for what they’ve really done. And if we do, victims can get the right support for what really happened to them.
I want to finish by saying thank you to all of you for being here and supporting not only the cause but for supporting me. I really have been overwhelmed by the response I’ve had and can’t believe this event has been so successful! For all those that have shared their stories with me, or their friends stories, and to all those whose stories remain untold – tonight is about you!
